Oh geez, the teenage years are going to kill me I'm sure of it. It's not that Chelsea is a difficult child. On the contrary, she's a total sweetheart (most of the time), but because of that I guess, she gets walked on a lot. I hate that for her. I feel her pain. It just breaks my heart to see it happen to her.
See, she's been friends with the same group of girls for a long time now, since elementary school. Last year one girl in particular started to ignore her. This really hurt her because it was her best friend. She was hurt but she didn't say anything. Over the summer that girl started to act like everything was great again. She was hanging out with Chels and calling and texting her. Well, school started and suddenly Chelsea isn't cool enough or pretty enough or something enough and she's started her crap all over again. Poor Chels. She doesn't know what to do about this.
Mark and I are really proud of Chelsea in that she doesn't follow the crowd. She does her own thing. We've always told her that cattle follow the herd, not people. She's free to make decisions on her own. She doesn't need her friends' approval to wear a certain shirt or look a certain way. So, she's always a little left of center because in her words, "I'm cool like that." The girl that's sort of snubbing her now doesn't do anything out of the ordinary because she's afraid to stand out from the crowd. I think she'd march right off a cliff if the rest of the group did. Sad really.
So, Chelsea was crying today because she feels like all her friends hate her suddenly. We talked a lot about if they were truly her friends then they'd be her friends no matter what color her hair was or how funky her outfit. We talked about being who she is because she likes who she is. I told her, "You be who you are because you like who you are! Love you and others will love you too!" But that's hard to live by when others are snubbing you. Ya know?
So, anyway, it hurts for my daughter to hurt. I hate it. A lot. And right now I want to march right down to that little divas house and tell her that one day she's going to look around and the people she thinks are her friends are as superficial as she is. And that one day she'll look around and wonder where all her true friends are and realize that she doesn't have any, because she didn't know how to be one.
And that's the end of my rant.
Monday, September 22, 2008
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2 comments:
Oh, that makes me so sad! I hope she's able to find some good true friends!
Oh, poor chels!! Give her a hug. Tell her Delton says hi!!
Oh, I don't look forward to those years.
Great seeing you today. Do you think they think we are a little weird at times when we start being our true selves? It's just funny how all the comments run so smoothly between us. We should take it on the road.
You are totally cool by the way! Letting D's daughter use your fax machine. And to think your daughter will turn out the same way - caring and beyond helpful! She has a great role (I almost spelled roll) model. YOU!
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